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MADE IN CORK... EXPORTED TO LONDON,PARIS AND DUBLIN IT IS FROM THE CAPITAL OF IRELAND THAT I AM ADDRESSING THE WORLD - SO PAY ATTENTION. HERE YOU WILL FIND GOOD BANTER, STORIES, LIES AND MORE LIES.MAYBE YOU MIGHT LIKE MY SHORT STORIES, LETTERS, ARTICLES OR POEMS. IF YOU LIKE WHAT YOU SEE TELL THE WORLD, IF NOT KEEP YOUR BLOODY MOUTH SHUT.

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2009-07-27

First letter to the Taoiseach

The Taoiseach
Dail Eireann
Dublin
Date as postmark

Dear Taoiseach,
It is with great pleasure and a deep sense of duty to you and to my country that I am writing to you today. As people like you good self are removed from the harsh reality of living on the ground, I would like to be your eyes and ears and keep you informed and advised of the policies that would find favour with the ordinary man in the street, and thereby keep you in office.
Here are this months recommendations
All citizens to be given a greyhound by the state. This would produce many and varied benefits – every family would be forced to walk the greyhound winter and summer thereby increasing the family activity graph by a significant percentage. This would have the knock on effect of reducing weight, decreasing heart and stoke victims and reducing the entire heath bill for the country. It would also aid the greyhound industry and the vets would not do too badly either.
The second suggestion is to grant a 20% increase on all winning betting dockets written out in Irish – help to revive the language. How good would a revival of Irish look on your CV.

May I offer these suggestions to you and hope you will see the sense of implementing them – I will be available for consultation should you require further information, you can get me on my mobile anytime. I will forward suggestions re the recession (remember we are in one) in the near future.
Lateral Thinking is here to stay.
Is mise le meas.

James A. Archer
PS : The greyhounds would be compelled to have Irish names as well.